This is one of the most common questions I get asked when coaching recruiters.
And honestly?
It confuses a lot of people.
Because logically, life is good.
Work is good.
Relationships are stable.
Money is improving.
Maybe your recruitment desk is finally moving properly.
So why do you suddenly feel anxious?
Why does your brain almost seem uncomfortable with things being okay?
You finally get momentum and instead of relaxing into it, you start waiting for something to go wrong.
If that sounds familiar, you’re not alone and you’re definitely not broken.
There are actually some really valid psychological reasons this happens.
Your Brain Is Designed to Look for Threats
The first thing to understand is this:
Your brain is not designed to make you happy.
It’s designed to keep you alive.
And historically, humans survived by spotting danger early.
Which means your brain naturally scans for:
- problems
- risks
- uncertainty
- potential threats
Even when life is objectively good.
Psychologists call this the “negativity bias”.
Psychologist and researcher Dr Rick Hanson has spoken extensively about this concept, explaining that the human brain evolved like “Velcro for negative experiences and Teflon for positive ones.” In other words, we hold onto threats far more tightly than moments of calm or success.
Which is why:
- one negative comment outweighs ten compliments
- one placement falling over ruins your mood
- one awkward interaction loops in your head all day
Your brain is constantly trying to protect you.
The obviously annoying thing is modern life isn’t a jungle. We don’t have to keep one eye open for animals attacking us anymore.
But in many cases, your nervous system still acts like threats are imminent.
Sometimes Calm Feels Unsafe
This part is huge.
For some people, chaos feels normal.
Stress feels familiar.
Pressure feels familiar.
Overthinking feels familiar.
So when things finally calm down?
Your brain almost doesn’t trust it.
You start thinking:
- “This won’t last.”
- “Something bad is about to happen.”
- “I need to stay alert.”
- “I can’t relax yet.”
Especially in recruitment.
Because this industry conditions people to expect emotional swings constantly (and let’s face it, they happen all the bloody time).
Good month?
Watch out for a bad one.
Big placement landed?
Don’t celebrate too early.
Candidate accepted?
Cool. Wait for the counteroffer.
You almost train yourself to emotionally brace for impact.
Which means peace can start feeling uncomfortable.
Clinical psychologist Dr Nicole LePera talks about this as becoming “addicted to stress” – where the nervous system becomes so used to operating in survival mode that calmness actually starts to feel unfamiliar or unsafe.
And honestly, I think a lot of recruiters unknowingly live there.
High Performers Often Struggle With This More
This is something I see constantly with ambitious people.
They become so conditioned to chasing the next thing that they stop feeling safe in stillness.
Achievement becomes tied to identity.
So when things are finally going well, their brain immediately jumps to:
“What’s next?”
“How do I keep this?”
“What if I lose it?”
Instead of actually experiencing the moment.
And weirdly?
Success can create anxiety because now there’s something to protect.
More responsibility.
More expectation.
More visibility.
More pressure not to lose momentum.
That’s why some recruiters feel more anxious at $700k billings than they did at $200k.
They’re more emotionally attached to the outcome.
Your Nervous System Might Just Be Tired
Sometimes anxiety isn’t even emotional.
Sometimes it’s physiological.
Poor sleep.
Too much caffeine.
Constant stress.
No downtime.
No exercise.
No recovery.
And recruitment is notorious for this.
People running on adrenaline for months straight, then wondering why they suddenly feel anxious when life slows down for five minutes.
Your nervous system can only stay “on” for so long before it starts signalling back.
Not every anxious thought is some deep emotional truth.
Sometimes your body is just screaming for recovery.
The Trap of Waiting for the Other Shoe to Drop
A lot of people sabotage good periods in life without even realising it.
Not intentionally.
But subconsciously, they struggle to trust stability.
So they:
- overanalyse
- create problems
- emotionally withdraw
- become hypervigilant
- self-sabotage opportunities
Because uncertainty feels more familiar than peace.
That’s an absolutely brutal way to live.
And the dangerous part is, the anxiety then becomes proof in your head that something must be wrong. Even when nothing actually is.
So What Do You Actually Do About It?
First:
stop treating every anxious feeling like a prophecy.
Thoughts are not facts.
Feelings are not always signals that something is wrong. Emotions are data – not instructions.
Sometimes your nervous system is just overprotective.
Second:
learn to tolerate things going well.
I know that sounds strange, but it’s real.
Some people are genuinely uncomfortable with happiness, stability, rest, or success because they’ve spent years emotionally preparing for chaos.
That takes awareness, focus and time to unlearn.
Third:
focus on grounding yourself in the present instead of mentally time-travelling into imaginary future disasters.
Ask yourself:
“What is actually wrong right now?”
Not:
“What could go wrong eventually?”
Massive difference.
And lastly:
build recovery into your life before your body forces it on you.
Sleep better.
Move more.
Get outside.
Switch off occasionally.
Stop glorifying permanent stress.
Because your brain and nervous system were never designed to operate at 100% permanently.
Finally?
The goal isn’t to never feel anxious.
The goal is to stop letting anxiety convince you that good things are dangerous.
Because sometimes life is actually okay and you’re allowed to experience that without waiting for it to fall apart.
